Guidance

1. Prayer to Discover the Desires of Your Heart…

“Yes, one must pray. What you are doing pleases me. For the time being keep a very active prayer life and God will then light up the other plans.” (Medjugorje - June 7, 1986)

Our Lady instructs us to keep a very active prayer life, which not only means pray, but pray with intention. The intention we need here is to discover God’s will for us. His Divine Will is not floating around in outer space somewhere, rather His will is already written on our hearts. So what we need to discover through prayer is not some ethereal, intangible, complicated notion, rather a simple understanding of what God has already placed on our hearts. Therefore, we need to identify what our desires are, because if they come from goodness, truth, and beauty, and they generate life, then they are on our hearts because God put them there in the first place.      

So if the desire of your heart is to live on a Catholic Family Homestead, then after an appropriate amount of prayer, discernment, discussion, and planning – Get on with it! Sometimes people get stuck in analysis-paralysis, and sometimes people get stuck in fear, but those who act on the desires of their hearts don’t get stuck at all, just fulfilled with God’s love and the peace and joy that come from the accomplishment of His will. Here’s a short excerpt from our own personal story that is provided to help illustrate this point of an active prayer life…

Over the course of the next several months, as we prayed and waited for God to “light up the other plans,” we did not just sit idly as if waiting for God to drop a letter out of the sky with instructions of what to do next. And this is a very important distinction for others to note as they discern God’s will in any situation, especially for major life decisions. Yes pray, and be attentive to God’s interior movements in your heart, but also actively collect more information, and actively pursue the direction that God has already placed on your heart.

(Excerpt taken from The History of Our Lady’s Ranch)

3. Evaluation to Prioritize Your Personal Values

God is our primary formator, and He has been forming us our whole lives in order to prepare us for our role in His great plan of salvation. Everything that has happened to us has been caused by God or allowed by God in order for us to grow into the human instruments that He can now work through for the benefit of ourselves and others. We all have a role in God’s plan of salvation, and each one of us has been particularly formed for our particular role, such that no one else can perform our role better than we can ourselves, nor can we perform anyone else’s role better than they can.  And God has already placed on our hearts that which He knows is the best good for ourselves and others, which culminates in our highest good, which is union with Himself, for He is certainly our highest good.

So here’s what happens as we make progress in our relationship with God… God wants all of us to use our gifts, talents, resources, and experiences for the work of salvation (for ourselves and others). When we begin to transform our lives in Christ, God’s work for us starts becoming more and more clear. We start our mission first by loving God with all our mind, heart, soul, and strength and then by loving our neighbor as our self. Then we begin to understand what specifically we are to do for others, and also how we are to go about doing it. Real joy begins forming in us when we finally discover God’s mission for us that He has planned since the beginning of time.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” (Jeramiah 29:11)

So how do we discover this mission that God has planned for us? Well, our God given mission always corresponds to the values and virtues that He has already placed on our hearts. When we talk about praying in order to hear the quiet whispers of God in our hearts, we’re not listening for voices, rather we quiet ourselves down in order to create a space for self-introspection. And what we’re trying to discover is not from an exterior source, rather from an interior source, who is God. And the actual thing that we’re trying to discover is who we are in God – that is who God is calling us to be. Then, after we discover who God is calling us to be, we can understand what he is calling us to do. And God reveals these things to us through our values.

Our values are the ideals that are most important to us. And we can stop to quiet ourselves and pray, and think, and actually start writing our values down on paper. Then we can prioritize our values to list them in order of which are most important to us. And this is what we do in order to begin the process of understanding who God is calling us to be, which leads us to what God is calling us to do (our calling). Following is a list of values that you can prioritize in the order that is currently on your heart. This list is not intended to be fully complete, but is pretty thorough for the sake of giving you a good start on the exercise. You’ll need to define each item for yourself, and add to the list as you discover new interests and understandings about yourself.

LIST OF VALUES…

Union with God
Unity with Spouse

Parenting Children
Interior Peace and Virtue
Sustained Health and Wellness
Extended Family and Friends
Time for Social Interaction
Serving Others – Ministry
Personal Wealth – Money
Environment – Nature
Education – Learning
Rest and Relaxation
Travel – Adventure
Entertainments
Food – Dining
Recreation
Hobbies
Music

Now then, after prioritizing your values, you can explore a little further what virtues God has put on your heart thus far in your life. Who are your favorite saints and why do you like them so much? What virtues do they possess that you admire? What are your favorite biblical passages? Did you think they are your favorites because of some random coincidence? No, they are your favorites because God is speaking to you through them. What are you hearing from God through them? Are you getting the idea now? Your favorite saints and biblical passages are different than other Christians’ favorites because God is forming you for your mission while He is forming them for theirs. So let’s continue…

• What ministries attract you at your parish?

• What type of merciful works do you prefer – spiritual or corporeal or both?

• Are you outgoing and extroverted? Or are you an introvert? 

• Do you get recharged around people? Or do you recharge when alone?

• Do you like to work outside in nature? Or do you prefer indoors?

• What natural terrain brings you closer to God? Tropical? Country? Ocean? Mountains?

• Do you like nature, gardening, animals, sunshine, water, quiet, and/or…?

As you reflect on these questions, make sure to put your answers down in writing – that is if you’re serious about your relationship with God, and if you really do want to move forward in his will. Otherwise, don’t bother writing and don’t expect to get much out of this exercise. You’re welcome to continue dreaming without actually moving forward towards a plan of action. Or begin writing your thoughts to more fully understand God’s plan of salvation for you that He has made since before the beginning of time.

Okay, the sarcasm has a purpose, which is to point out the most important consideration of your prayerful discernment of God’s will, and what you are going to do about it as you discover it. And that most important thing is to build up your desire for it. The more work you do to more fully discover God’s will for yourself, the more you can grow in your relationship with God, to then understand yourself better in relation to Him. Then you can visualize your mission much more clearly, which will increase your desire to accomplish God’s will in your life. This desire must grow to a more pure, supernatural desire in order for you to withstand the difficulties and hardships that will occur along the path of accomplishing your mission. 

And that is why it is necessary to write out your discoveries – To organize your thoughts along with the desires of your heart to then prayerfully consider who God is calling you to be and what God is calling you to do. And then those prioritized lists of discoveries can be converted into a plan of action that includes long term goals and the intermediate steps required to accomplish those goals.

5. Analysis to Itemize Your Assets & Liabilities

Which of you, wishing to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost to see if he has the resources to complete it?” (Luke 14:28)

A. Financial Assets Itemized

1. Literally list all liquid assets (bank accounts, etc)

2. List all equity in any real-property owned (home, etc)*

3. List all current automobiles and equipment and tools

4. List anything else that might be helpful on a homestead

*The equity is the net amount of value you have in a real-estate property, which is the appraised value less any loans on the property (mortgage or otherwise).

B. Financial Liabilities Itemized

1. List any long-term loans (automobiles)

2. List any revolving debt (credit cards)

3. List anything that is going to cost you time and/or money to fix it or deal with it, or get rid of it prior to building your homestead. The intention here is for things, but some people in your life might apply here too ☺

C. Annual and Monthly Income vs Expenses

1. What are your current monthly revenues (net salary, net income)?

2. What additional income do you receive in the year?

3. Convert your annual net income into a monthly amount.

4. What are your current monthly expenses (include vacations)?

5. What expenses find you throughout the year (repairs, etc)?

6. Convert your annual expenses into a monthly amount.

D. Make a current monthly Budget Statement (for yourself)**

1. This is for you so be relatively conservative

2. First write down your monthly net income total.

3. Second write down your itemized list of expenses on a left column

4. Third write down your estimated monthly amount of each expense on the right hand side of the expense listing (leave another column blank)

5. Add an expense line item called miscellaneous, which will pick-up those unidentifiable items that seem to eat away at your possible savings

6. Add another expense line item called contingency, which will pick-up those random costs that find you even when you’re not looking

7. Then total your monthly expenses at the bottom of your column and make sure it is less than your monthly net income total

8. The extra column on the far right is there for you to track your expenses from week to week to make sure you stay within the monthly budget that you just made.

**For those of you who already have something like the spreadsheet described above, just remember a few things before you jump into building a homestead as outlined below…

E. Basic things that happen when building anything –

1. Everything costs more than we originally plan

2. Everything takes more time than we originally plan

3. Nothing ever goes exactly as planned, especially when other people are involved in the planning (because ideas change and opinions change)

4. God allows all these disappointments for our spiritual growth

5. All of the above is okay and affects us less with prayer and humility

Well, for those of us who are actively praying and discerning this idea of building a homestead, we now have written down and prioritized our values along with our long term goals (or ideas of long term goals as the case may be). Then we considered our financial situation with respect to available assets and current monthly budgets. So now it is time to investigate what options we have to live on a homestead. For some people, financial considerations will comfortably allow several options to purchase property and/or housing in a number of different locations and/or scenarios. But for most people, the first question immediately becomes, “How can we possibly get started on a homestead because we just can’t afford it?” Actually, that’s the statement I hear most often and unfortunately, I have never been able to answer it. Until now…

The answer is that we need each other… And that’s a good thing! 

We have far too long been living in a culture that demands individualism. We have come to suspect that something must be very wrong with us if we need someone –  That it makes us weak, or incapable, or some other derogatory term. But that’s just nonsense! God never intended for us to do everything by ourselves. Thomas Merton coined the phrase, “No man is an island.” And he’s right! Yet also, “No family is an island.” And “It takes a village to raise a child.” Here are a few other quotes that speak of our human need for one another, taken from the “Lifestyle” section of this web site… 

For a single family, establishing and maintaining a small farm, home schooling the children, and providing for the basic needs of each family member can be a daunting task.  It’s a lot of work.  That’s why our ancestors didn’t usually do it alone – they had their extended family… 

It is this spiritual bond that makes our family in Christ.  “For we were all baptized with one spirit into one body [the body of Christ].  (I Corinthians 12:12)  So developing and maintaining a small  family  farm  together in  an  extended  family or “clan” setting does not necessarily mean a blood-related family. (Excerpt from “Lifestyle” – An Agrarian Way of Life)

God did not create us all in one age group because as in all things, He provides a wondrous variety.  So He gives us the gift of relationships in a vast array of colors, shapes, sizes, personalities, vocations – and ages.  He gives us each other in several generations so that we may learn from, counsel to, share with, entertain, and enjoy one another in a vibrant social setting.  We are indeed social beings for God made us dependent on one another throughout all ages of our life on earth. 

(Excerpt from “Lifestyle” – The Extended Family)

So now then, as you investigate options – Yes, be aware of your own financial abilities and constraints, but we suggest that you remain open to some new alternatives that maybe you haven’t yet considered. Maybe some new possibilities will work and maybe they won’t, but that depends on your personal values and long term goals, coupled with how strongly you desire to live on a Catholic Family Homestead.

7. Discussion to Review & Evaluate a General Plan

A. Decide who you want to have in the discussion

1. Just your spouse in the first tier?

2. Include older children or parents?

3. Include other interested families?

4. Do you have an appropriate advisor?

5. Do you have a spiritual director?

B. Fun talks vs. Business talks

1. Sometimes when you talk, just randomly enjoy possible dreams.

2. Sometimes discussions are prayerful and spiritually oriented, and

3. Sometimes discussions are intensely directed by financial concerns

4. Make time for all these discussion types, while identifying who are appropriate persons to be present during each type of discussion.

 C. Reviewing and Evaluating Ideas

1. Review your options and narrow them down to the ideas that most fully correspond to your values, interests, and goals.

2. Evaluate your options according to financial feasibility while remaining open to creative financial solutions, including other people and/or families.

3. Organize your options into a list of favorites with the most favorite first.

D. Making a General Plan

1. Take option number one and identify the major components involved (ie. Purchasing property, building a house, changing jobs, etc…)

2. Take option number one and consider a realistic time frame that would be reasonable to accomplish the major components.

3. Take option number one and apply the financial requirements needed to accomplish the major components.

4. Take option number one and list all the special requirements and/or people that would be necessary to accomplish the major components.

5. Write down all the answers to the 1, 2, 3, and 4 steps above.

9. Action to Accomplish the First Steps of the Plan

A. How and when to start accomplishing the first steps of your plan…

1. The answer of how and when to start your own homestead is contained in the prayerful reading and discussion of the content presented in this web site along with your own personal discovery, discernment, and planning. It is not for us to tell you how and when and where to build, but for you to actively pray for an understanding of your mission in God’s will, and for you to obtain the strength to accomplish it within your lifetime while here on earth.

B. Maybe the most prudent first step is to simulate your plan by temporarily living in the country on your own, or on an existing Catholic Family Homestead.

1. A low risk, cost effective way to begin your homesteading experience is to simply rent a home somewhere out in the country. You could experiment with a few farming activities to begin a process of active discernment to discover how agreeable your family is to a farming-country life.

2. Many interested families and individuals have visited us (over the years) at Our Lady’s Ranch in northern California for a daily farm tour or a weekend retreat, and then progressed towards finding properties for themselves in various states throughout the country.

3. We are currently developing some short-term housing facilities here to allow interested families extended-stay opportunities to live our daily spirituality with us and participate in our agrarian lifestyle as they move forward with discernment of their own values, goals, and plans.

4. As more interested families begin homesteads of their own, others will be able to visit them and learn from them throughout their process of discernment.

C. When you’re ready for a more substantial investment into a family homestead, then it’s time to activate your General Plan through specific tasks.

1. Now that you have formed a Specific Plan by identifying intermediate steps along with a time schedule of the work and a task list, you can begin accomplishing one task at a time, going right down the list.

2. Just remember to remain flexible with your plan as you discover new information, and as new opportunities present themselves to you.